So you broke up with me exactly one year ago – one day after New Year’s.
I guess it took me a year to write this because had it been written 364 days ago, it would’ve been peppered with bitterness and sarcasm to be frank.
The truth is, while you could’ve certainly handled the ending better, I’m no longer bitter.
And the fact of the matter is, neither of us was without fault. We both had our failings and in our hearts, we both know we tried our best to make it work. That we managed to last more than three years was already something of a miracle because I think we both know, we held on long after the expiry date intended for us. It was a commendable effort as there were just too many variables working against us. Now I understand how silly it was to try to force a fit when we just weren’t right for each other.
So, I want to thank you for having the courage to be the one to walk away. Because Lord knows, I wouldn’t have.
Because in the past 12 months since, I have found the “me” that had been lost for far too long.
You leaving, forced me to take a good hard look at my life and be really honest with myself about where I was. Certain pillars of my life weren’t working and I was unfulfilled on many levels. Our breakup jolted me out of my comfort zone so spectacularly that 2015 ended up becoming the most extraordinary year of personal growth and transformation in my life.
Instead of jumping into another relationship as a rebound, I took the time to do some really difficult internal work on myself. I went to hell and back on all my issues, dealing with them methodically until I fell so far down the abyss that the only way from there was up.
I went back to the drawing board on myself and worked on building a new, better me.
I learnt many lessons about myself that would take me forward. I discovered that I really am stronger than I’ve ever given myself credit for. I learnt the wisdom of letting go. I realised that I truly am enough and complete unto myself. And the most powerful of all: I proved to myself that I cannot be broken.
Your leaving was the catalyst to helping me find that inner peace and self-acceptance that I have been searching for all my life. It has been a long, arduous journey to finding myself again and I am happy now – from the inside. So, I thank you sincerely.
Through the process, I also got really, really clear about what I want: from life and from my next partner. And I’m looking forward to the future for once.
But please know I’m not sharing this with you in the hopes of us getting back together. That chapter is closed and closed it will remain. You have moved on and you seem happy and I am glad. Because we both deserve to be happy and loved. Maybe we’ll be friends one day, maybe we won’t. In the meantime, do take care and I wish you well.